16th of June 2009

10am

"John, John, get up."

It's Ellen's voice again, persistent, strong. Willing me to try again.

So here goes...

-----
3pm

Okay well that didn't go too well.

The first part was alright. The nurses didn't try to fight me this time and gave me the walking frame when I asked. My body doesn't feel like it's mine anymore. Feels like I've got to learn to drive it again.

I did manage to stand and put weight on my leg, which feels like a cross between raw meat and robo-cop.

I took 6 steps, easy enough, all things considered, and I was beginning to think:

"I've got this, I'll walk out of here soon, piece of piss."

Then I saw this bloke through the window. Man he was bashed up bad, head swelled up like a pumpkin, stitches everywhere, bruised black and blue. And then the guy did a strange thing - he tilted his head at exactly the same time as me, then blinked and stared in shock.

That's when I knew. That's when I knew that beaten up man looking back at me, was ME!

Apparently I blacked out then, knocked everything flying, and yanked out all the tubes as I fell. Had to have all my drips put back in. Lucky I was out to it. Sure it made it easier for the nurses.

So, the thing is.

If that guy I saw really is me, well he didn't survive a shipwreck. I know what that looks like. Nah, that bloke, he was pulled bloody and broken from a car wreck, just like they said.

I keep asking for Alcyone, but nobody knows her. My big sis looks at me strange and says I was driving back to her place at night when it happened.

So what the fuck is going on?

Could the accident scramble my memory this bad?

I'd give anything just to go to sleep and wake up at the bottom of the ocean, at least then I'd know what to do.